Somequest, makers of the Beauties Unveiled games, has come out with Fantasy Beauties, a jigsaw game with a twist. You get a jigsaw board and an empty space will light up. At the top are six pieces. You have several seconds to put in the correct piece. What’s nice is, you can actually place any piece, not just the one being lit up and it’ll count. As you put in pieces, your powerup meter will fill. First it will fill to auto-put one piece, then three pieces, then five. Fail to put a piece in time, the meter will reset and the pieces at the top will change. When you complete the picture in Fantasy Beauties, you get stars based on if you completed it and how fast you did it. You can always look at the completed picture by pressing Y.

Fantasy Beauties is a fine little game, except there is a little problem. The DLC. Yes, there are already six DLC beauties to download(with three boards each). Three are free, three are two dollars each. They all should be free and in the game to start with it. There is no real excuse for this and I see it as slimy. I’m imagining somequest is going to do the RedDeer Model and release bundle after bundle. Let’s hope not, as they didn’t do it for previous games, but I put nothing past them or any developer anymore. Therefore, I will dock a point from the score, giving Fantasy Beauties a Recommended with a seven back-end score. The game is good and even addicting to a certain extent, but the developers sinking to scummy levels just does not sit right with me, especially when the game is priced at twenty dollars base.

Overall: Fantasy Beauties is a fine little jigsaw puzzle game, but the pricing and DLC doesn’t sit well with me.

Verdict: Recommended

eShop Page

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Ecchi Time is the most pointless thing I have ever seen on the Switch. Sure there is there is AAA clock with 55 versions, including the 99 dollar AAA Clock Gold, but at least there are mini-games in it, or so I’ve been told. This is nothing but a rotating series of images of one of five girls, as the background of a clock. And that’s it. What’s worse, the backgrounds are all Stable Diffusion created, and not good images either, as in some the hands are messed up royally.

The insidious part of Ecchi time is the excessive DLC. There are eight different extra women, all for $2.69 each. Add them all up, you get around $21, three times the price of the original of $7.69. There’s no reason these extra images cannot be in the original game. Its not like it cost anything extra to create them. All this is, is a cash grab by the developer, nothing more, nothing less. Bottom barrel garbage to take up space in the eShop. Ecchi Time gets a Garbage with a one back-end score. I mean the 55 version of AAA clock are a travesty, but at least there is a mini-game to justify its existence. No such luck here. .

I do have to wonder though, will there be eighty versions of Ecchi Time? We’ll see… Actually, I guarantee that’s exactly what is going to happen, Yabai.Games, RedDeer.Games… hmm… Could there be a connection? Probably not, but they’re all extremely scummy anyway.

Overall: Ecchi Time is nothing but an evil cash grab. There is no point to this. Just use your phone for the same effect.

Verdict: Garbage

eShop Page

P.S. Please support hentai games that took effort, like PumPum

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Love Island is by Big Way, makers of such trash as Hentai RPG Isekai Journey and Hentai Uni. Its a match 3 dating sim in the vein of the classic Hunie Pop on steam. And you know what? After playing it a bit, its good! Yes, Big Way made a game that’ll get a Recommended verdict! I was shocked at the quality of this. Let’s dig in:

In Love Island you play a horny guy traveling on vacation to an island resort where you get to screw 5 lovely ladies: The receptionist at the resort, a lifeguard, a maid, and a drunk tourist, Beat them, and you’ll unlock the fifth lady, a DJ named Cumchita. They each have three progressively harder levels that act as the framework for a very basic story. Like the receptionist plays out in the lobby, her office, then a secluded beach spot. Screwing is represented by lots of hearts on a black screen, and a jingles. Now for the game play itself:

Love Island’s game play is very similar to Hunie Pop, crossed with Isekai Journey. The red, yellow, blue and orange tiles fill the seduction meter on the right. The green martini’s fill your health. Above the challenge meter is a counter that counts down to when the girls challenges you(“You have a small dick” ect.). This takes away a certain amount of your health. Matching four a kind gets you a heart box that fills your energy meter. The energy meter is used for the lips(Health), gag(seduction points) and the Champaign(shuffle). On the left are three items: The strawberry gives health. The flowers are seduction points. The rings act as extra lives(and will be needed later on). Beating a level gives a choice of one three stat boosts that you’ll need to beat later levels. Lose health its game over and back to the start, like it was in Isekai Journey. Overall, Love Island is good!

I have to commend Big on improving. Love Island is a good game. It won’t last particularly long, but that’s alright, its fun while it lasts. Now what keeps this from a Must Play is that the girls are stereotypes and not endearing, like the Hunie Pop crew was. Still this gets a Recommended Verdict with an eight back-end score. Its not a classic, but it sticks the land quite nicely. Now if Big Way can keep the momentum going, that’d be great!

Overall; Love Island is a match 3 Dating Sim that is Big Way’s best game, and is actually solid.

Verdict: Recommended

eShop Page

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Warning: Finally Pakotime made a NSFW game!

Sugoi Girls Lovely Wife is the next generation of Pakotime, famous for the Hentai Girls line of games. I know what happened, after releasing ten titles in 5 months diminishing returns set in to the point where I doubt they were selling enough copies to justify making them. Never mind that I guarantee that those cost peanuts to make. So Pakotime changed the name of the series, and brought along bare boobs. Yes there is nudity in this. No, it does not justify buying this, because the art is AI generated.Yes, even the boobs in Sugoi Girls Lovely Wife are AI generated by something called OnlyWaifus.

But the problem with Sugoi Girls Lovely Wife is the problem that plagues all these games, why? You can find AI generated porn images online, I already linked where Pakotime gets their images. All you’re really paying for is the ridiculously easy “puzzle game” that is the same game in 90% of these. I imagine once Sugoi girls line reaches diminishing returns, Pakotime is going to pull a hot love dreams and bare all. And it will sell for a few weeks until Nintendo gets around to pulling it. Then I don’t know what Pakotime will do. Probably fold, and the eShop will be a hundred times better for it. Do not buy these games, they are bottom barrel and terrible. The worst of the Nintendo eShop personified.

Overall: Sugoi Girls Lovely Wife is Pakotime bringing the bare boobs, but still not bringing a reason to buy it.

Verdict: Garbage

eShop Page

P.S. Read my full editorial on where Pakotime gets their images.

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Dark Fantasy Epic Jigsaw Puzzle is the third iteration of the Dark Fantasy Jigsaw Puzzle franchise. Yes, there are three of these jigsaw games with sexy dark fantasy women. You can find the first and second on Steam and on Switch as well. It is important to note the original release dates on the first two on Steam, 2018 and 2019, pre-AI. That means the artwork is custom in those. The artwork is also custom here, meaning no AI. The artwork is very good. The game itself is more or less a standard Jigsaw game. There are six difficulty levels; twelves pieces, twenty-four pieces, forty-eight, Ninety-six, one ninety-two and for the masochists, three hundred eight four pieces. Unlike the awful Jigsaw Puzzle Fever, the pieces sit on the sides of the board and you drag them in. You can’t lose in Dark Fantasy Epic Jigsaw Puzzle, which is nice!.

Now the buttons at the top left of the screen: The eye drops a little picture of the finished product, which is helpful. The button next to it changes the background to one of several types. On the right side, the right hand button, outlines the pieces in white. The big question mark automatically puts a piece in place, but doesn’t add to your score. There are twenty-four images in all in Dark Fantasy Epic Jigsaw Puzzle. They are played in order. However, playing one unlocks the next for all difficulties.

Dark Fantasy Epic Jigsaw Puzzle is a tough game to give a verdict for because games like this are critic-proof. It has its audience, and they’re playing for the sexy pictures. Still, the jigsaw action itself is one of the better renditions I’ve played. Work went into the and it shows. I’ll give the game a Recommended with a seven back-end score.

Overall: Dark Fantasy Epic Jigsaw Puzzle is a jigsaw puzzle game with sexy dark fantasy woman, and nothing more!

Verdict: Recommended

eShop Page

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DateJournal is a dating sim where you romance 6 lovely ladies in St. Petersburg, Russia. You do this by collect intimacy point ,by collecting stars in a Minesweeper-like dates. There are three three stars type, red(strength), grey(charisma) and blue(intelligence). Each lovely lady has their own preference. You also collect roses to increase passion, which increases the amount of intimacy you gather. There are also enemies on the board, which you attack and defend against with corresponding stats. There are broken stars that decrease intimacy, but they can be transformed into other things via items.Oh and did I mention each click takes energy, and if you run out of energy, you lose? Well yeah there’s that too.

Then there’s the board game section in Datejournal, that you use to move around St. Petersburg and romance the various women. You get cards with the number of moves you can make. You can move once per turn, then either send a gift of use the space for something. Like in the club, you use charisma points you collect to raise various stats. Same with the gym and university for their respective stats. There’s also the mall, where you use money to buy new date spots. The date spots correspond to a specific outfit you can have the lady wear, and not much else.

There’s there the dialog and story of each woman in Datejournal. Which honestly, is quite boring and doesn’t really matter. It often makes no sense. Like one lady is telling me off, while my response gives hearts, showing she likes me or something. There are five dates, and after each date you get a picture. None show nudity. While the game is rated M, it is not because there are titties(though the final pics are very risque). Anyways, like I said, the actual story lines are probably the worst part of the game. I just couldn’t bring myself to care about anyone. You can find out more about the ladies, but doing that doesn’t amount to much, since sending gifts on the board really isn’t important I found.

I’m kinda torn on Datejournal to be honest. One one hand, the game had the decent board game section and dating game section. Problem is the ladies and stories just aren’t interesting to me. Maybe something was lost in translation, not sure. I’ll give DateJournal a Your Mileage May Vary(YMMV) with a seven back-end score. In the end, play for the minesweeper-like dating game, ignore the story.

Overall: Datejournal is an alright dating sim where the ladies are boring, but the actual dates are not.

Verdict: YMMV

eShop Page

P.S. For a dating sim to avoid, try Summer Sweetheart!

Game received for free from the publisher

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I’m in a bit of a conundrum. Earlier today, I smacked Hentai Girls Sweet Doctor for being shovelware garbage, and the exact same game as its predecessors. It was more of the same crap. Now we come to Beauties Unveiled 2, which is more or less the same exact Qix clone as its predecessor, Beauties Unveiled 1. The sequel has the exact same style game play, and a cadre of beauties to, ahem, unveil. Plus, these were released about 5 weeks apart. But the difference is here with this series, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. The Hentai Girls series is fundamentally broken to the core, the Beauties Unveiled series is not. I have nothing wrong with game giving us the same stuff over and over if its good, as in the case of the Clutter Series.

Well Beauties Unveiled 2 isn’t the exact same game as its predecessor. The artwork is manga-style while in the predecessor they looked more western-style. If I had to guess, the game did gangbusters in Japan. Also noteworthy is that the art does not appear to be AI generated. This is a plus, given how much AI generated art games are all over the Nintendo Switch eShop. Plus, I didn’t notice it before, but the images form a little story. Like you’re peeping at a girl through an air vent. Second image. she notices you. Third image, she finds you.

In the end, if you liked Beauties Unveiled 1, you’ll enjoy Beauties Unveiled 2. The game play itself is unchanged, but there was no real reason to change it. Finally, the rating notes in game purchases, but the DLC girls are all free.

Overall: Beauties Unveiled 2 is mostly the same game as its predecessor, but not a bad thing here.

Verdict: Recommended

eShop Page

P.S. Where is my Mokoko X sequel?

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