Romeo Is A Dead Man Review
Dead On Arrival
High All the trademark Suda-51 wackiness longtime fans will be frothing for.
Low Actually playing it.
WTF So much to choose from that I can’t narrow it down to one thing.
The 21st Century has been an unstable time for the videogame industry, but one of the few constants has been Goichi Suda (better known as Suda-51) and his team at Grasshopper Manufacture continuing to make very weird games.
He’s made triple-A titles for big name publishers, he’s made small pieces via self-publishing, and considering how weird his stuff is, it’s a small miracle that despite never achieving any particular success, this auteur (in an industry with few of them) gets to keep making games at all.
The latest group to back Suda is Chinese company NetEase, who hedged their bet so hard they went ahead and bought his company. At the time this was welcome news, as it provided some stability for a small team in an age of constantly increasing budgets. Unfortunately, despite that influx of cash, Romeo Is A Deadman has all the trappings of a title that had its newfound budget slashed in the middle of development.
Suda-51 clearly loved him some Rick & Morty at the time of conception. Given how that show’s relevance has absolutely fallen off a cliff over the past couple years, it feels shockingly dated to have a plot involving a whiny kid named Romeo Stargazer ripping through the spacetime thanks to inventions from his eccentric grandfather, who just happens to tag along as a living patch on Romeo’s jacket.
Romeo gets eaten by some monsters in the opening minutes of play, only to find his grandfather turn him into a crime-fighting cyborg to save his life. After this, Romeo is suddenly working for the FBI to track down his girlfriend Juliet (of course) who happens to be causing all kinds of trouble on various timelines.
The similarities in core plot points between this game and Rick & Morty might induce some groans, and Suda-51 doesn’t help things by also hitting a bunch of social commentary he’s already done before (and done better) in other works. The sleepy American town featured here reminds me a lot of the setting from Lollipop Chainsaw, and he’s tagging a lot of No More Heroes bases when it comes to the power fantasies of the main character. He even does the No More Heroes III thing when a room full of enemies is disposed of and a big “DEAD” flashes on screen.
With that said, there are very few dudes with a brain like Suda, so there’s still plenty to like in terms of aesthetics. One of the highlights is the base of operations for Romeo’s FBI team — it’s a giant spaceship, and when on said ship, a 16-bit JRPG graphic style is adopted. It’s a fantastic way to interact with the many odd characters who accompany Romeo on his journey. Unfortunately, this is also the highlight of the experience from a production standpoint.
One example of where Romeo falls down is the way cutscenes are presented. Some are fully animated, but about half are presented as ‘comic book’ panels like something out of the ’90s. This is a surefire sign that the money ran out at some point. None of the dialogue outside of the major cutscenes is voiced, and having Romeo & his grandpa attempt to banter via text on the screen with no VO while running through levels is difficult to follow and feels low-rent at the same time.
However, these are middling problems compared to the real issue — playing Romeo Is A Deadman sucks.
The backbone of play is third-person character-action with some light Souls elements such as a bonfire equivalent, and this steak just doesn’t sizzle. Combat is woefully basic, and swinging around various blades has very little oomph to it while players slice through unbelievably boring enemies.
Romeo then attempts to mix up combat with third-person shooting, and this feels somehow even worse. Enemies have weak points to aim for, but these require a high level of precision while blasting away with a pea shooter that is a pain to reload.
Not making things better is the truly boring level design, which are stereotypical areas of a small Pennsylvania town (City Hall, a shopping mall, a hospital, etc.). Half of the levels consist of going through parallel universes mirroring the level one is playing, and walking through endless cubed hallways in other sections makes for a rather boring TRON knockoff. There’s just not much enjoyment to be derived here, mechanically speaking.
I can’t share specifics due to embargo restrictions, but a bit later in the campaign is perhaps the worst-designed level I’ve played in a long time. It’s a series of constantly-repeating hallways, and at one point a very slow monster capable of one-hit-kills crops up. Avoiding this dude while players sneak around these boring corridors is absolutely mind-numbing, and it was during this section where the utter disappointment of Romeo Is A Deadman sank in.
The drabness of both gameplay and level design crosses over to the graphics as well. While the 16-bit hub world looks fabulous, that pizzazz doesn’t transfer over to the rendered environments in combat. They look basic, and their overall low fidelity makes the occasionally-erratic framerate even more eyebrow-raising — and that’s coming from someone playing with the horsepower of a Playstation 5 Pro. There were also some bugs that popped up here and there, and a few enemies T-Posed in lieu of any powerful-looking attacks. Adding salt to the wound, the weak audio mixing makes combat sound like a muffled mess.
It’s a true bummer to have one of my most-anticipated games of the year end up being a profound disappointment. While Suda-51’s trademark style and weirdness is still present, this is perhaps his worst-playing game to date, and this leaves me a bit worried about Grasshopper Manufacture being in NetEase’s hands. Those who enjoy Suda’s work will still manage to find bits of his output that they like here, but it’s a real slog to get to the good stuff, and I suspect that anyone who’s not already a fan of his catalog will find this experience to be genuinely awful.
RATING: 4.5 Out Of 10
Disclosures: This game is developed and published by Grasshopper Manufacture. It is currently available on XBX/S, PS5, and PC. This copy of the game was obtained via publisher and reviewed on a PS5 Pro. Approximately 9 hours of play were devoted to the single-player mode, and the game was completed. There are no multiplayer modes.
Parents: According to the ESRB, this game has a pending rating as of writing this review on February 9th and editing it on the launch day of February 10th. With that said, I see no way in which this game does not get a rating of M for Mature due to extreme violence and strong language. This is definitely in the “Do Not Consider” pile for concerned parents as enemies turn into blood fountains frequently, and there is a high degree of coarse language. With that said, it’s all a bit comical, so I don’t see it being a particularly traumatizing experience.
Colorblind Modes: There are three colorblind modes available for either red, blue, or green deficiencies.
Deaf & Hard of Hearing Gamers: Subtitles are large and clear, but cannot be re-sized or have their color changed. No audio cues are needed for play. All important information is displayed visibly on screen. This title is fully accessible.
Remappable Controls: The game has no remappable controls. Players control the main character with the left analog stick and control the camera with the right analog stick. Jumping is done with X, dodging with the O button, light and heavy attacks are done with square and triangle. Shooting weapons is done with the L2 and R2 buttons, and menus are accessed with a combination of the D-Pad and the L1 button.
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